It's A Red Snowing Life
by justanoutlaw
Summary: Domesticity prompts submitted via Tumblr...
1. The Great Thermostat Debate

I reblogged a prompt list on Tumblr with a bunch of different domesticity situations. Loboselinaistrash requested to see #22: the thermostat fight for Red Snowing. Set as though they were never separated due to the curse and it broke when Emma was a baby.

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There were many modern inventions that the residents of Storybrooke loved as opposed to the options back in the Enchanted Forest. Granny always talked about how much easier it was to cook with ovens and microwaves. The dwarfs had fallen in love with sports and found the T.V great. For David, Snow and Ruby, though, it was thermostat that really made a difference. David had grown up poor on a farm. There was a fire place in the winters, but it barely heated up the whole house. In the summer, he had to deal with the unbearable heat. Ruby hadn't been as poor as he, but even so, she still had to deal with similar weather. Snow had a bit better living in the castle in the winters, but summers weren't much better.

However, each of them had different opinions when it came to the thermostat in question. Snow ran cold, while David and Ruby were always hot. They had gotten to what they believed was a happy medium. It was the summer, Ruby and David could dress in lighter layers if necessarily and Snow would pull a quilt over herself if she ever got too cold.

One day, however, they realized that one of them had been fiddling with the thermostat. Snow found the loft was way too cold and would put it back to the normal temperature. Other days, Ruby and David thought it was too warm. After a long day of training for an upcoming marathon, they were quite uncomfortable when they entered the loft. They found Snow in the kitchen, cooking.

"Snow, come on," Ruby said as she adjusted the thermostat. "I thought we had an agreed temperature."

"We do, I haven't touched it."

"Right, that's why it's hot as the Underworld in here."

"I don't know what you two are talking about. Lately when I come in here, it's been freezing cold, even for your standards."

David's brows furrowed. "We haven't touched the thermostat."

"Then who has? The Underworld fairy?"

"Just keep it right here," Ruby grumbled. "I'd rather not feel like I'm melting in here. You know my fur causes me to run warm."

She stomped off to the bathroom, clearly feeling grumpy. Snow frowned after her. She honestly hadn't been touching the thermostat, she thought they were the ones that were messing with it. David noticed the look on her face.

"If we haven't been touching it and neither have you, then who?"

"I have no idea," Snow shrugged. "I have a feeling of what'll cheer Ruby up though."

She slid the lunch into the oven and together, the two of them headed into the bathroom, finding Ruby just about to turn on the water for a shower.

"Room for two more?" Snow asked with a smirk.

"You know water conversation is the best for the town," David added, wrapping an arm around Ruby's waist.

Ruby couldn't help but smile at her spouses. "As long as David doesn't make any jokes about shaving my back."

"I'll be on my best behavior, I promise," he said, kissing her neck.

They got in the shower, taking turns washing each other and having a bit of fun. It was definitely one of the easiest ways for them to lighten the mood now that Emma was a toddler. When they were done, they got wrapped up with towels and headed out of the bathroom. They were suddenly hit by a harsh chill, even Ruby and David found it to be too cold. They looked over at the thermostat and found Emma standing on her stool, playing with the knob. She was supposed to be taking her nap.

The three exchanged a look. It was clear just who the thermostat bandit was.

A quick talk with Emma, explaining that the knob was not a toy and putting tape over it so she couldn't play with it again, the thermostat never seemed to budge from the agreed temperature.

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As always, I do accept prompts! Whether it be on here or my Tumblrs: just-an-outlaw and justanoutlawfanfiction.


	2. The Big Comfy Couch

I reblogged a prompt list on Tumblr with a bunch of different domesticity situations. Loboselinaistrash requested to see #4: Trying to buy a new couch with Red Snowing. Setting this in the same universe as "The Great Thermostat Debate".

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They had put it off for as long as they possibly could. The loft hadn't been their first home as a married trio, but it had been their first home as a family. It was where they had raised Emma, at first unknowingly under the curse and then when it was broken. It was where she took her first steps and said her first words. Sure, things were cramped with three adults and a toddler, they couldn't entertain often…but at the end of the day, they were happy.

Then both Snow and Ruby found themselves pregnant a little after Emma's 4th birthday. They hadn't exactly always been careful, but it still took them a bit by surprise. The babies were due within just days of each other. There was no way the loft was big enough for just one more baby, let alone two. They found a farmhouse in town, with lots of property. They were even planning on getting a dog and some other animals. Their giant bed along with most of Emma's furniture would be brought over. There was just one thing they wanted to get rid of.

The couch.

Snow joked that it had been Regina's harshest punishment for them. It was big enough for them all, but very uncomfortable. They told Rumple he could leave it for the next tenants or burn it, whichever he saw to be a better fit. Geppetto had opened his own furniture store, so while Granny was keeping Emma preoccupied with coloring books and cookies, they headed over to it.

"I like this one," David announced not long after they arrived. He plopped down on a brown leather couch that had feet rest that extended.

Ruby shook her head. "I don't think so."

"What's wrong with it?"

"It's the first one you found. Get your butt up, you're not getting out of this easily."

David rolled his eyes and rose to his feet. "Fine, fine."

Snow spotted a peach linen one and grinned. "How about this."

"No."

"Why?"

"It's pink."

"It's peach."

"It's still pink." David replied, stubbornly.

"Plus, it's really light. We might not care if Emma makes a mess of the one we have now, but we do want this to last, don't we?" Ruby pointed out.

Snow cringed as she imagined sticky fingers and felt tip markers ruining her nice, new couch. She supposed her wife had a good point. They continued to look around at the other ones, but none seemed to be the right fit. They were either too small, meaning not everyone could cuddle up on movie nights. All the sectionals were either too lightly colored or just not their style.

They were just about to give up, when Geppetto started moving a new sectional from the back. All three of their eyes fell on it. They were true loves, a team, though they didn't always agree. Without even speaking however, they knew it was the right one. It wasn't too light, but was also comfortable. They would be able to cuddle up when they wanted to and have space when the kids weren't always getting along.

It was just the right one for their family.

A few months later, David turned the key in the lock of their new house. It was the first time they were going to be seeing it fully furnished. Emma was in Ruby's arms, frowning. There were a lot of new changes at once, she was getting two baby siblings and now a new house. She didn't like change, no matter how many times her parents told her she would like it. Together, they all walked inside and looked around. Emma's frown increased.

"I don't like it," she mumbled.

"Uh huh," Snow said, taking her from Ruby and heading into the living room.

She settled down onto their new couch and curled up on it, holding Emma close, despite her growing baby bump. Ruby and David sat on either side of her, curling up with their girls. Ruby rubbed Emma's back while David sang her a soft lullaby. In time, Emma drifted off to sleep. David leaned back against the couch.

"It really is comfortable," he said.

Snow smiled. "It is. I think we can stay here for a bit."

"Well what do you know, once again, we agree" Ruby smiled and kissed both of her spouses.

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As always, I do accept prompts! Whether it be on here or my Tumblrs: just-an-outlaw and justanoutlawfanfiction.


	3. Remodeled

I reblogged a prompt list on Tumblr with a bunch of different domesticity situations. Loboselinaistrash requested to see #2: "Why did I let you remodel the bathroom?" with Red Snowing. Set about 6 months after the events in "The Big Comfy Couch".

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Snow carefully settled Neal down into his bassinet while Ruby did the same with Charlotte. Emma had fallen asleep curled up in the rocking chair while she watched her mommies rock her little siblings. Ruby lifted Emma into her arms and carried her down the hall to her own room. All three kids had woken up at the crack of dawn. Emma refused to wait for her food, so David got her some cereal while Ruby and Snow fed the babies. They had not calmed down since then. Emma had run all over, seemingly taking out every toy. Charlotte was being clingy as usual and Neal was just being a bit fussy. Naptime had not come soon enough.

Just as Ruby and Snow exited from the children's bedrooms, they head a drill coming from the master bathroom. They groaned, checking to make sure the kids were still sleeping before heading down to it. David had the tools spread out everywhere as he worked.

"Why did I let you remodel the bathroom?" Snow moaned.

"Because the house came with twin sinks and there's three of us," David reminded her.

Snow let out a sigh, knowing he was right. Back in the Enchanted Forest, they were able to commission a bigger bed to be made and there wasn't really an issue with bathrooms. This realm was a whole other issue. Their large bed had taken longer to be made and had barely fit into their loft. It worked better in their new house, but the bathroom still had a lot of work to be done. Leroy was helping David with parts of it since his cursed memories including plumbing experience, but David was just trying to install the cabinets on what would be Ruby's end of the sink.

"The kids are taking a nap," Ruby told him. "Can you maybe take a break?"

David checked his watch and nodded, standing up. "You actually go them all to nap at the same time?"

"A pure miracle."

"What do you say we take a nap ourselves?"

"Best idea you've had all day," Snow said, kissing him.

Naptime didn't last as long as they hoped, only about an hour and a half as opposed to the regular two hours. Neal was the first to wake up, followed by Emma and then Charlotte. David resumed his work in the bathroom and realized that one of the pipes under Snow's sink was a bit loose. He figured he didn't need Leroy's help for that, it should have been just a simple fix. However, he moved his wrench in the wrong way and water began flying out, getting him wet and starting to flood the kitchen floor.

"Shit," he muttered, attempting to get it to stop.

Emma wandered into the master bedroom, having not really seen her dad all day. She was starting to miss him and get a bit bored since her moms were preoccupied with the babies. She stopped in the doorway of the bathroom and her eyes lit up.

"Swimming pool!" She exclaimed excitedly.

"Emma, baby, no…"

But it was too late, Emma ran into the bathroom and started jumping around in the rising water, splashing him. She grabbed the rubber ducky that she had kept in there the last time she took a bath in their big tub and started to push that amongst the water. Eventually, David managed to get the water off, but not until his wives were in the doorway, the babies on their hips. They looked from David to Emma who was having the time of her life in the puddles of water.

"I was a shepherd, then a prince!" David argued before they could say anything. "What do I know about plumbing?"

That managed to get them all laughing. Adjusting Charlotte in her arms, Snow leaned down and picked up Emma as well. Ruby fetched towels, distributing them to her spouses before looking down at Neal.

"Your daddy and sister are very silly, Nealy," she said, tickling his chin. "Yes, they are."

After that, they had Leroy and his crew finish up the bathroom, while David worked on building a tree house for the kids. That was more up his alley.

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As always, I do accept prompts! Whether it be on here or my Tumblrs: just-an-outlaw and justanoutlawfanfiction.


	4. The Gathering

I reblogged a prompt list on Tumblr with a bunch of different domesticity situations. Loboselinaistrash requested to see #9: Our first dinner party for Red Snowing.

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Ruby smiled after her grandmother as she carried Neal and Charlotte's car seats to the car with Emma skipping behind her talking a mile a minute. As hard as it was to be away from her babies for the night, she knew they would be just fine with Granny. She headed into the kitchen where Snow was cooking like a madwoman, just as she had been all day. She had decided to go with a traditional Enchanted Forest meal: goose, potatoes, some other assorted veggies and some pasta as well. They were going to be throwing their first real dinner party since they had come to Storybrooke through the curse.

They had decided to invite the two other trios that they knew. After the curse broke, Ruby, Snow and David reminded everyone that it was possible to fall in love with two people. Aurora, Phillip and Mulan had been one of the trios to get together not long after. Regina, Robin and Marian were together as well. David entered the kitchen, taking a swig of his water.

"The table's all set," he said.

"Great. The goose will be ready as soon as we're through with our salads," Snow replied.

"Do you need any help?" Ruby asked her.

"Can you chop up that baguette please?"

Once she was through with that and David had gotten the butter out, they realized they had yet to change. Showering together proved to be difficult as David was clearly craving some attention and kept kissing Snow's neck. She found it hard to resist him and leaned into him as Ruby massaged her back with the body. It was one of the few times they had alone, with just the three of them. Neal and Charlotte had been born on the very same day and things had been hectic ever since. Luckily, they had the help of their families. They knew that their guests had been busy as well, they were also new parents to baby Phillip. Regina had adopted Robin and Marian's son, Roland, plus she had one of her own, Henry. Marian had also just found out she was pregnant yet again. They more than ever were about to understand Ruby, Snow and David's crazy life.

Eventually, they all got out of the shower and started to get ready. David put on a button-down shirt and some slacks. Ruby and Snow had both been feeling a bit self-conscious about their bodies since the babies were born. They ended up wearing similar dresses, though Snow's was blue and Ruby's was black. The minute David saw them, his eyes lit up just as they had the first time he had seen them.

"You both look beautiful," he said.

Snow pulled at her dress. "I don't know, I feel like my stomach is sticking out."

"My boobs look weird," Ruby complained, playing with the neckline.

David shook his head, wrapping an arm around each of them. "I have the most beautiful wives of all the realms."

They each gave him a small smile, he seemed to always find a way to charm them. Snow headed downstairs to put out the food, before either of her spouses could notice a telltale mark on her neck.

It wasn't long before the doorbell was ringing. The Hood-Mills' trio was the first to arrive, closely followed by the Briar-Fa's.

"Something smells delicious," Aurora announced as soon as they had made their way inside.

"Is that goose?" Marian asked as David collected her shrug.

"Yes, Snow's been working hard all day."

Robin rubbed his hands together in excitement. "It's going to be a wonderful dinner."

"Where is Snow anyway?" Regina questioned, looking around for her step-daughter.

"She's still in the kitchen, making sure that everything is just right," Ruby said, shaking her head. "You know her, she's quite the perfectionist."

Snow walked out of the kitchen, smiling at the people in front of her. She hugged each of them in turn, not understanding why they were looking at her funny. She noticed that Regina sent a death glare to David, which only confused her further. Mulan was snickering behind her hand, Phillip and Robin were no better. Aurora and Marian seemed to be the only ones to stay composed.

"What is it?" Snow asked.

Aurora put a hand on her shoulder. "Why don't we go into the bathroom? I can help you cover it up."

Blush spread across Snow's cheeks upon realization and she clapped her hand over her neck. "Oh…oh my God."

Aurora lead her off to the bathroom, while Mulan, Phillip and Robin were still finding it the funniest thing in the world. That was probably the last thing anyone would have expected from Snow White.

"I guess no one could say that you three don't have a healthy sex life," Phillip teased, only to get an elbow to the gut by Marian.

"Can you three stop being 5?" She asked.

Mulan shrugged. "Not really."

Eventually, Snow came back out and the dinner began. No one seemed to mention the patched over hickey on her neck. The food was delicious and they were able to toast to a quiet evening among friends and family. It was hard finding other couples they could relate to, but with these trios they felt at home. Despite an awkward beginning, it seemed to be just as well as the banquets they had back in their old land, maybe even better.

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As always, I do accept prompts! Whether it be on here or my Tumblrs: just-an-outlaw and justanoutlawfanfiction.


	5. Snow Day

I reblogged a prompt list on Tumblr with a bunch of different domesticity situations. Loboselinaistrash requested to see #12: shoveling snow for Red Snowing.

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"Snow day! Snow day! Snow day!" Emma chanted excitedly as she danced around the kitchen in her pajamas. It was the 4-year-old's first official snow day since she had started pre-school and as much as she loved school, the idea excited her.

Ruby, Snow and David looked after her with matching grins. As much as Emma loved school and all her friends, she clearly loved being able to stay home and play in the snow. They had to admit that they were grateful she could be so happy about snow. Growing up, Ruby and David hated winter, many times it did damage to their homes. It would take months for them to be able to afford repairs. Snow had grown up in a castle, in fact she had been born in one of the harshest winters. Even so, she had never been one to enjoy the season.

It was much different in Storybrooke. They had heat and were able to afford proper clothing. Their house was also built much stronger than the cottages that Ruby and David had grown up in, there would be no damage done.

"Can we go out and play?" Emma asked.

Ruby nodded. "As soon as breakfast is done, we'll get all bundled up."

"Charlie and Neal too?"

Snow glanced back at the babies in their high chairs. "I think one of us will have to stay inside with them. They're still a bit too little."

Emma frowned. "So, we all can't play outside?"

"How about this," David said, trying to go into game planning mode before his daughter got too upset. "Mommy can sit with them on the screened in porch. It has the space heater. They'll be warm and she can watch you all play."

"And Daddy shovel," Ruby added with a wink.

He groaned. "Come on, really?"

"I did it the last time it snowed, it's your turn."

It was always a battle over who would have to shovel the driveway and walk. While it was easier to do with the modern shovels, they still hated that chore more than any other. However, fair was fair. If his wives were going to preoccupied with the kids, he figured it was the least he could do.

After some chocolate chip pancakes, they all got dressed for the warm weather. Emma was bundled up in her red winter coat and white beanie, along with matching gloves. She was practically dragging Ruby and David outside the door once they tugged their boots on. Snow giggled and sat down in a rocking chair on the screen porch, holding her son and youngest daughter on her lap, both were also bundled up nice and tight.

Ruby and Emma were getting to work playing and building a snowman. David smiled over at them as he got started with shoveling. It hadn't been too long since it stopped so it wasn't too hard to manage. He was throwing it over his shoulder as he went, when he caught Snow watching him.

"I wonder if we could get a plow."

"Really?" She called through the screen door.

"Well, it wouldn't be the first time that I've plowed snow."

Snow's jaw locked and she raised an eyebrow at him. Leave it to her husband to have all the corny dad jokes.

"I'm also used to dealing with it wet."

"David," Snow warned. "The children."

"What? I'm just talking about shoveling."

"Sure, you are." She began to rock Neal as he fussed. "I think even your son is calling you out."

"I have to agree with David," Ruby added. "I like snow best when it's wet."

Snow rolled her eyes and continued to rock the kids. They smirked, knowing not to go any further and cross a line. It was just fun to wind her up-just as she did whenever she saw sheep or wolves.

Eventually, David finished up the job and headed out to play with Ruby and Emma. Snow decided to join them as well with the babies, figuring it wouldn't hurt them to be out for just a bit. David took Neal as they finished putting together a snowman.

"Do you think he'll come to life like Frosty?" Emma asked once David leant their creation his hat. "Or Olaf?"

"I don't think so sweetheart," Snow said, gently.

"Then again, this is Storybrooke," Ruby contradicted with a twinkle in her eye. "Anything can happen."

Snow couldn't help but smile in return, she supposed her wife had a point. "How about we head inside and have some hot chocolate?"

"With cinnamon?" Emma questioned, bouncing a bit.

"Is there any other way?"

They all headed into the warm house, discarding their wet clothing by the door. Snow fixed the hot chocolate and they settled around the table with their mugs. Ruby giggled upon seeing Emma's whipped cream mustache and wiped it away. Snow smiled as David fed a bit of the whipped cream to the babies, giving them some of their baby puffs as well. It had been a fun snow day so far. A part of her hoped that the next one would happen soon.

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As always, I do accept prompts! Whether it be on here or my Tumblrs: just-an-outlaw and justanoutlawfanfiction.


	6. Happy Birthday

This was a prompt submitted to me by loboselinaistrash from a drabble post I reblogged: "Can you just leave me alone?" Set shortly after the curse broke in this verse, my own take on "The Queen Is Dead", because Johanna deserved better.

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By that point, Snow was used to waking up in the early hours of the morning to look after Emma. She was a year old, but still woke up multiple times throughout the night. However, to her surprise, she didn't wake up until 7:30. The smell of her favorite French toast came from the kitchen. Slowly getting out of bed, she wandered over to the kitchen. Ruby and David were cooking, the latter holding Emma on his hip as he did. There was a long stem rose coming from a vase on the tray with some snowbells surrounding it.

"What's all this?" Snow asked, folding her arms over her chest.

Ruby turned and raised an eyebrow. "We're making breakfast."

"Why?"

"We're hungry," David said, trying to play dumb.

Snow sighed. "Guys, we've talked about this. We had a deal."

"We know. We just thought with the curse broken, having our family back together, Emma being with us…you'd change your mind."

Snow sighed, biting her lip at the mention of her daughter. She knew one day she was going to have to explain the same to her. Given how extravagant they planned on making her birthdays, it'd be a hard one. "Well, I didn't."

"Snow…" Ruby started to rebut.

Snow gave her a half-smile before walking into the bathroom. She didn't want to seem selfish, she really wasn't trying to. The only reason that Ruby and David even knew when her birthday was, was because her old nanny, Johanna had told them. She hadn't celebrated her birthday in decades, not since her mother died. Every year, Ruby and David tried to make a big deal of it. Even under the curse, "Mary Margaret" had felt the same way about her birthday. Ruby somehow was the only one who knew and would do the same thing at the diner, with similar results.

If she had accepted the deal, if she had blown on the candle, would her mother still be alive? Who would it have killed? Would it have been worth it? How did her mother even get so sick? She was perfectly healthy for so long, it just wasn't fair. She missed her mother dearly.

Once Snow finished up with her shower, she headed out into the kitchen and found a wrapped box on the table. She looked over at her husband and wife, who shook their head.

"I found that on the doorstep this morning when I went to get the paper," David explained. "It's not from either of us."

Snow lifted the lid off the box and gasped when she saw what was inside, it was her old tiara. Slowly, she lifted it out of the box and looked at the note attached. _Thinking of you today, Johanna_.

"Johanna," Snow breathed, the tears prickling her eyes.

"Your old nanny?" Ruby asked, walking closer. "I didn't know she was in Storybrooke."

"Neither did I."

"We should go find her, I'm sure she'd love to meet Emma."

"I…I have to do it alone."

"But Snow…"

"Can you please just leave me alone? This day is hard enough."

Her words came out harsher than she meant them to and she could see the hurt in her wife's eyes. She didn't mean to cause it, but at the same time, she wasn't sure she had the right emotions to apologize in that moment. Throwing on her jacket, she headed out the door and started walking around, trying to find Johanna. Her old tiara was still in her hand.

After the curse broke, the family had made peace with Regina. It hadn't been easy, but they had found a way. After that, Snow had found out that her mother wasn't always the person that she thought she was. She had been part of the reason to send Cora down her dark path. Cora's actions were still her own, but had her mother been kinder…well, then Snow wouldn't have been born and Regina probably wouldn't have either. The whole thing was still conflicting on her.

She hadn't grown up with a mother, not since she was quite small. There weren't many memories she had left of Eva. Sure, there were times when Regina would act as a motherly figure, but the truth was, she was only 7 years older than Snow. She didn't quite know how to be a mother yet. It left Snow wondering if she was doing right by Emma. Would she know how to raise her properly? Could she raise her to be a good person? Would they even get along? She loved that little baby with all of her heart and yet she scared her, because she was responsible for her. She was lucky to get this second chance with her, she didn't want to screw it up.

After talking with Regina, she found out where Johanna lived. She walked down to the small cottage, where she found her former nanny planting flowers. She felt a small smile go across her face.

"Johanna?"

Johanna turned around, beaming. "My Snow," she whispered. She walked closer, cupping her face. "I was wondering when I'd get to see you."

"I got your present." She held up the tiara. "Thank you."

"I found it in that Rumpelstiltskin's shop. I convinced him to give it to me, it was rightfully yours."

Snow bit her lip. "I was so terrible to you when I was child. What I said…about you not deserving a tiara…"

"That was all in the past, darling. You turned out to be an amazing queen."

"For a short period of time." She sighed. "I know my mother tried to correct my father's indulgences, I'm just not sure how much it worked."

"It did, trust me, it did. I am so proud of you."

Snow nodded. The guilt of the bratty child she had been before her mother's talk to her about everyone deserving to feel special would always haunt her. "Ruby, David and I are back together."

Johanna clapped her hands together. "That is just so excellent. I always thought the three of you made a lovely couple."

"We have a daughter…Emma. She's 1."

"I'm sure you have pictures." Snow nodded and pulled out her wallet from her jacket, showing Johanna the pictures she kept. "Oh, she's adorable, looks just like you did at that age, except she has David's hair."

"She does. I'm just so scared. What if I can't do this? What if I screw her up?"

Johanna shook her head. "You won't do that."

"How do you know?"

"Because you know what it's like to long for a mother. You know better than to do that to your Emma. You'll be amazing with her, I know you will."

Snow nodded, wanting to believe that more than anything. It was just going to take some time. "I'm just glad I had you growing up, you taught me so much."

"I'll always be here for you, Snow."

"Would you…would you like to meet Emma?"

"Of course!"

Johanna linked arms with her and they walked back to the loft. When they arrived, David instantly greeted the older woman. Snow turned to Ruby and wrapped her arms around her waist.

"I'm sorry about earlier," she whispered. "I was just overwhelmed."

"It's okay."

"No, it's not. You and David always try to make this day easier for me. I do appreciate it."

"Hey, just because I'm the wolf doesn't mean I'm the only one to have a little bit," Ruby smirked, causing Snow to giggle and kiss her.

Snow walked over to the playpen and lifted Emma out of it, carrying her over to Johanna. She took her and teared up, instantly cooing over the little on. Snow leaned back into David with a smile. Another person to love and cherish their daughter.

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As always, I do accept prompts! Whether it be on here or my Tumblrs: just-an-outlaw and justanoutlawfanfiction.


	7. Back To School

This was a prompt submitted to me by bauerfanstraten from a drabble post I reblogged: "She's 6, how can she scare you?" So, set a couple of years in the future for this verse.

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Snow let out a soft sigh as she looked out at the kids running around in the sprinklers. Summer had gone by faster than any of them would've liked. It had been an amazing summer at that. They had gone to Disney World for vacation before going up with Regina, Robin, Marian and their family to a cabin on the lake. In the next few days, Emma would be going back to school. Kindergarten had been rough on all of them, but Snow was still feeling nostalgic. It seemed like only yesterday that the curse had broken. It was all a part of life, as much as she just wished that time would just slow down.

David walked inside, holding Neal on his hip. "Someone needs a diaper change."

Snow smiled, noticing how wiggly Neal was, excited to get back out with his sisters. "Don't worry, bud. You'll be done soon."

"Sprinklers," he said, pointing back out the window.

"I know, you all look like you're having so much fun."

David adjusted Neal in his arms so he didn't get loose. "Hey, so I was talking with Emma and she seems to think that you're going to be her teacher this year."

Snow raised an eyebrow. Once Charlie and Neal had turned one, she decided to go back to work. They had replaced her in the 4th grade classroom, but the kindergarten teacher had just retired. It ended up working out perfectly with Emma starting school. It had been a fun year, though a bit challenging. She had to learn being both mom and teacher, while Emma had to learn that things had to be different during school. She assumed that Emma would understand that she would get a new teacher for 1st grade, she understood that every grade had a different teacher.

She let out a sigh. "I just thought I wouldn't have to tell her. How am I supposed to do this?"

"You just tell her."

"But how? This whole situation…it's scary."

"She's 6 years old, how can she scare you?"

Snow rolled her eyes. "Emma doesn't scare me. I meant this could be scary for her. You know how she felt about starting school, the only thing that helped was that I was going to be her teacher."

"I tried telling her differently, but she was adamant about it. I think this is a conversation you need to have sooner rather than later."

Snow knew he was right. Once he carried Neal off to change his diaper, she headed out to where Charlotte and Emma were chasing Ruby around in the sprinklers. Charlotte saw her other mom and grinned.

"Mommy!" She squealed.

Snow smiled in return. "Hey sweetheart."

"Chase, chase Mama!"

"I see that." She kissed her forehead and ruffled Emma's soaking wet curls. "Are you having fun, Em?"

"Uh huh. Mama goes really fast."

"That's just what wolves do," Ruby retorted with a playful smirk.

Snow knelt in front of Emma and Ruby turned off the sprinklers so her wife wouldn't get wet. "Hey, so Daddy said you were talking about school."

"Uh huh. Can I decorate your classroom again, Mommy?" Emma asked.

"Of course you can, we'll go in the day before school starts." Snow tried to word the next sentence very carefully. "Sweetheart, you do know that Miss Frizzle teaches 1st grade, don't you?"

"Uh huh. But you're my teacher."

Snow shook her head. "No, I'm not going to be your teacher this year. I'm going to teach the kindergartners. Miss Frizzle is going to be your teacher."

Emma's lips fell into a pout, any sparkles in her eyes melting away. Ruby and Snow both knew the signs of an Emma meltdown, one was definitely coming on. She stomped her foot on the damp grass and folded her arms over her Finding Dory swimsuit.

"No!" She shouted.

Ruby put a hand on her back. "Emma…"

"No! Mommy's my teacher! I get to see her every single day!"

"You'll still get to see me every day," Snow soothed, rubbing Emma's tummy, the one thing that always calmed her down as a baby. "This year, you'll just have a new teacher."

"I don't want a new teacher! I want you."

"I know, baby." Snow gave her a sympathetic smile. "But you'll love Miss Frizzle. She's so much fun, I hear you guys get to go on really cool field trips. And you know what? On the first day of school, we can even have lunch together."

Emma sniffled, her lips still jutted out in a pout. "Promise?"

"Cross my heart," Snow said, repeating the action with her fingers. "You know we can go get you a new backpack and supplies tonight."

"Just me and Mommy?"

"Yup," Ruby confirmed. "Daddy and I will stay home with Charlie and Neal."

Emma sighed, nodding. "Okay. I guess it won't be so bad."

Snow smiled, tapping Emma's chin. "That's my brave girl."

That night, as promised, Snow took Emma to the store as soon as dinner was finished up. David settled down onto the couch beside Ruby. Charlotte and Neal were playing in front of the coffee table. Being born on the same day, everyone considered them twins, even if they hadn't shared a womb. They seemed to share a very close bond, regardless of that.

"You know, Snow was thinking maybe in the winter they should start going to nursery school," Ruby said.

David frowned. "Who told these kids they were allowed to grow up?"

"I have no idea," she chuckled, shaking her head. "I will admit, I am a tad jealous that Snow will get to see Emma throughout the day, I was last year too."

"We could always get jobs at the school."

"I don't like kids." David gave her a look. "What I mean is, I don't like other people's kids. Ours are different, they're cute."

He laughed, wrapping an arm around her. "Whatever you say, baby."

* * *

As always, I do accept prompts! Whether it be on here or my Tumblrs: just-an-outlaw and justanoutlawfanfiction.


	8. Fears

JustMeAndMyKeyboard requested to see back when Ruby got pregnant, worried that once the baby is born, it'll change how she feels about Emma and the baby Snow is carrying. It's up to Snow and David to convince her that she's wrong.

* * *

When Emma was born, Ruby knew that she loved her as if she had carried her in her stomach. Over the years, she had been just as much her mother as Snow. She'd rocked her to sleep at night, changed her diapers and had been the first one that Emma had walked to. She loved Emma with all her heart and there was never a doubt in her mind that she was her mother.

Then, Ruby found herself pregnant. A few days later, Snow discovered she was expecting as well. At first the family was overjoyed. They had always planned on a large family, but after the curse broke, nothing seemed to be working. These babies were definitely a miracle. With the help of Ruth's necklace, they were able to discover that Ruby was carrying a girl and Snow was expecting their first son.

Then, people started to get into Ruby's head. A few ignorant folks had told her that she was finally about to be a mother, as if Emma wasn't her daughter. She brushed it off at first, knowing she was definitely not about to be a first-time mother. But as time went on, she began to worry more. Would she love this baby more than Emma and the child that her wife was carrying? She would never intentionally do so, but would her brain just cause her to? It became her worst fear. She never wanted her oldest daughter or son to feel unloved.

David and Snow could tell that something was wrong with their wife. They finally decided to say something when they went on a date night. Emma was safe at home with Regina, so they felt that they could all speak freely.

"Ruby, what's been going on with you?" Snow asked.

Ruby shook her head. "I don't know what you're talking about, I'm fine."

"No, you're not. You've been so quiet these past few weeks, tonight you barely wanted to let Emma out of your sight. Normally, you make fun of me and David for doing that."

"She's my daughter too," she snapped back, causing Snow to raise an eyebrow.

"Of course she is, we know that."

Ruby saw the confusion in her wife's eyes and ran her hand over her face, sliding down onto a bench. David and Snow sat on either side of her, each taking a hand. They had seen this side of Ruby before, but only when she was scared. It had been years, not since she was insecure about the wolf side of her. She hadn't been able to change since she got pregnant and they knew it had been making her feel a little more emotional and out of sorts.

"I'm scared," she admitted.

"Scared about what?" David asked.

"What if when this baby comes," she placed a hand on her middle. "I somehow love her more than Emma and our son?"

"Oh Ruby, that's not going to happen. You love Emma, so much. You always have."

"I would never do it on purpose, but what if my feelings for her change? What if I start treating her differently? I don't want to do that."

"You're not that kind of person."

"Sometimes it happens without people realizing it. You hear stories all the time…I just…I don't want to do that. I want my children to feel loved, I don't want them to think I have a favorite."

"Do you think I'll be like that with our younger daughter?" Snow asked, causing Ruby's eyes to widen.

"No, of course not!"

"Then why do you think that you will?"

Ruby bit her lip. "People have just been acting like I'm going to be a first time mom. I know I'm not. It's still scary."

"Screw what other people think," David said. "Haven't you been the one to always say that? Your love for Emma and our son will never change."

They could still see the fear in her eyes, even as she snuggled up with them. Throughout the next few months, it would pop up on her face. She seemed to be clinging to Emma more and more over that time.

When Charlotte and Neal were born, Ruby felt the same tug holding them both for the first time as she did with Emma. It wasn't until Emma came to visit her siblings that she felt she could breathe again. As Emma curled up into her mama's side, smiling down at her new baby sister, Ruby finally knew it was true.

She loved all three of her children. It didn't matter how Emma and Neal had become her children, they were still her children. She loved them just as much as Charlotte and she always would.

* * *

As always, I do accept prompts! Whether it be on here or my Tumblrs: just-an-outlaw and justanoutlawfanfiction.


	9. Ruby's Pup

This was a prompt submitted to me by JustMeAndMyKeyboard. Set when Emma is a teenager in this verse. Trigger warning: attempted date rape is featured in this.

* * *

Growing up, Emma always seemed to be friends that were children of her parents' friends. Her main partners in crime were Alexandra and Melody. They would play while Snow, Ruby, Ella and Ariel talked. Even as they got older, their friendship stayed solid. However, they were also developing friendships with people outside their group and at first, Emma's parents saw nothing wrong with it.

Then she met Mandy.

Mandy was the daughter of Derek and Odette, who had been rulers of a kingdom not too far from the Enchanted Forest. She seemed nice enough whenever she came around, though she seemed a bit standoffish around Ruby. The latter just chalked it up to her being a wolf, not everyone was comfortable with that or knew what to expect.

One Saturday, Emma was invited by Mandy to come over. What she didn't expect, was for Derek and Odette to be out of town and for her to be throwing a party. She tried to leave, knowing she'd be in a lot of trouble, but Mandy sweet talked her into staying. She went as far as to charm the door so Emma couldn't leave. Emma decided to hide out in a bedroom, where she met a guy named Justin. He seemed to like the same music she did and took out his phone so they could listen to some. He got Emma some soda, but after a while, she started to feel funny.

"There was no alcohol in that drink, was there?" She asked.

Justin shook his head. "Nope."

"I don't feel so hot. I think I should try to call my parents…"

"You said they'd be pissed if they knew you were here, just lay down and relax," Justin suggested.

Emma went to protest, but sleep suddenly sounded very tempting. She collapsed back onto the bed with Justin's help and he started kissing her neck. She tried pulling away from him, but couldn't.

"Justin, stop."

"Just give in," he muttered. "There's nothing you could do."

Emma couldn't even use her magic, she was far too weak. No matter how much she moved, she was trapped. Finally, she let out a scream, one that was probably going to be what saved her. The door burst down and Alexandra ran in. She punched the guy in the jaw, causing him to drop to the floor. Looking around the room, she saw the bottle of pills now in plain sight, her muscles tightening.

The guy jumped up to attack her, but at that moment, August came walking in as well, looking pissed. Justin ran as fast as he could. Alexandra started looking Emma over, but she was slowly slipping into unconsciousness. She knew Emma needed to be taken home, even if it meant she'd get in trouble. While August helped Emma get comfortable on the bed, Alexandra looked through her contacts. Ruby was the first one to catch her name, so she quickly sent her a text.

10 minutes later, a red Camaro came zooming into the driveway. The door to the house was kicked open and Ruby stormed in, causing all the kids to freeze.

"I don't care where you go, but you've all got to get out." No one moved. "NOW!" The music turned off and they all started running out the door, Mandy included. "Oh, not you." She grabbed her by the arm. "Show me where my daughter is, now."

Mandy scoffed, but lead Ruby down the hall to where she had heard the screams coming from earlier. Ruby was shaking with anger. Alexandra had included in the text not just about the attempted rape, but also that Mandy had charmed the door so the unsuspecting couldn't leave. She knew the girl had magic, she was a product of true love, but didn't expect that.

Once they reached the bedroom, Ruby rushed to Emma's side. Alexandra sat next to her unconscious friend, stroking her hair. Ruby bit her lip, her little girl was just sleeping, but she knew that things could've gotten much worse.

"I called Thomas and Ella," she finally said, looking over at Alexandra. "I saw their car not far behind me. I'd go out there before they get here." She glanced over at August. "I know you're old enough to be here, but you too."

The two nodded and headed out the door. Ruby kissed Emma's temple and let out a deep breath, trying to stay calm. She always assumed it would be David that stopped the parties, he just seemed like the better choice. However, both he and Snow had headed out of town to take Charlotte and Neal to a swimming competition. She and Emma were due to join them the next day since the latter had exams, but Ruby wasn't sure if they'd be able to make it.

"This is all your fault," Ruby declared, turning to look at Mandy. "If you had just let her leave, she wouldn't have even been in this mess to begin with."

Mandy rolled her eyes. "Emma is such a wet blanket, I just wanted her to have some fun."

"She is a good kid! Yes, she can be rebellious, but even she wouldn't be so stupid to go to an underage beer rager. You had no right to hold her here. You can guarantee I'll be calling your parents as well."

Once again, the teen rolled her eyes. "What do you even care? You're not Emma's real mother."

Ruby's muscles tightened even further as she stared at Mandy. Those were words she had heard from people over the years, but it seemed to have died down. Most people accepted their family and whoever didn't, well, they didn't care about that. All that mattered was that they loved each other. Ruby knew she didn't have any blood connection with Emma or Neal, but she loved them more than anything in the world, just as much as she loved Charlotte.

She had woken up with Emma in the middle of the night, nursed her to health when she got sick and helped her with her homework. When Emma had her first heartbreak the year before, both Snow and David were working, so it was her who helped her baby through it. She was Emma's mother, just as much as Snow.

"You listen to me," Ruby's voice was scarily quiet as she stepped closer. "I am every bit Emma's mother. You, are nothing but a bratty, selfish teen, who knows nothing about parenthood. Family is not built by blood. I care about Emma, because she is my little girl. No one messes with my pup and tonight two people did. I'll be dealing with Justin later, but I'll handle you now."

A flicker of fear crossed Mandy's eyes. She no longer looked like the confident, "don't give a shit" teen that she had been early. Ruby got straight up in her face and glared down at her. A moment later, Thomas stepped into the room, dressed in his deputy uniform.

"You'll be spending the night at the station," he informed Mandy.

Her eyes widened. "What?!"

"You're being charged with underage drinking and distributing liquor to minors, along with holding them hostage." He slid the cuffs onto her wrist.

"Oh, did I forget to mention that Ella followed me in her car, but Thomas was in his squad car?" Ruby asked with a smirk. Mandy looked as though she was going to faint.

"Rubes, Leroy called, he found Justin at his house," Thomas told her. "He's bringing him in too. Do you need any help with Emma?"

"Nah, I can handle her."

Ruby picked Emma up with ease. For a 15-year-old, she was so tiny. Having been born premature, she had always been small. Not to mention, she was naturally smaller with her werewolf gene. She carried Emma out to her car and gently laid her down in the backseat. When they got back to the house, she tucked her into bed. Snow and David had already been notified and trusted her to handle it. They'd be returning the next morning, as soon as Charlotte and Neal heard that Emma was sick, they wanted to head back.

In the early hours of the morning, Ruby heard moaning coming from her daughter's room. She went in and found Emma sitting up in a bed, half-awake. She settled down next to her, putting a hand on her back.

"Hey pup," she whispered. "How you feeling?"

"Weird, Mama. What happened last night." Ruby slowly explained the situation and she chewed on her lip. "I didn't even remember going to Mandy's."

"You're not in trouble, pup. She is, Justin too."

"I can't believe they would do this. Mandy…she could be a bit rough…but…"

"Don't worry about her, it's over. Though, I don't think Mom, Dad and I want you hanging out with her anymore."

Emma nodded. "Agreed. Thanks for saving me, Mama."

Ruby smiled and wrapped an arm around her. "Anytime. I'll always come for you."

* * *

As always, I do accept prompts! Whether it be on here, my Tumblrs: just-an-outlaw & justanoutlawfanfiction or my Twitter: justanoutlawfic.


	10. The Talk

So, this is combining two requests actually. JustMeAndMyKeyboard sent me one and then I was telling loboselinaistrash about it and she requested that I included something. All I'll say is this: Emma's first period. In this verse, Henry isn't Emma's son, however he is still Regina's.

* * *

Emma normally loved family dinner nights. Regina, Roland and Marian would bring Henry, Roland and Peanut over. The adults would hang out, she and her siblings got to play with their cousins. It was nice to have people like them and Phillip in their lives, they really understood what it was like to have parents in a polyamorous relationship.

However, this particular night, the 12-year-old wished her family was going to be anywhere but at her house.

She knew this day was coming. She had two mothers, she had seen the video in 5th grade. Even so, it was still weird to find that blood in her underwear.

Emma didn't want to tell her parents, not yet. She was freaked out of her mind and knew they'd get all sappy on her. So, while Snow and Ruby were busy cooking and David was playing outside with her younger siblings, she managed to slip out the door and took her bike to the pharmacy.

Ducking her head so her uncle Sneezy wouldn't see her, she made her way to the feminine care aisle. Her eyes widened at all of the options. There were tampons, that came in _sizes_. What kind of person needed jumbo?!

"That's too complicated," Emma mumbled to herself, turning to the pads.

They weren't much better. Some had wings! There was no way she was equipped to handle that. She fumbled through her pocket and pulled out her cell phone, dialing Ruby's number. A few minutes, her mama answered.

"Hey pup," she said. "What's going on? Did you head off to Alex's? Regina, Robin and Marian will be here soon…"

"I went to the pharmacy. I'm so confused! Why do these pads have wings?! Do they fly?"

Ruby was quiet for a minute and then started laughing. "Oh pup…"

"Mama!"

"Just come home. Mom and I will take care of you, we have options. Just…" She was clearly trying to stop laughing. "Just come home, please."

Emma sighed and hung up her phone, heading back outside to her bike. It wasn't long before she was back home. Snow wrapped her into a big hug.

"Oh, my baby."

Emma poked her head up and looked over at Ruby. "Rat."

Ruby rolled her eyes. "She's your mom, she needs to know. Come on, Snow. Let's show the newest member of our club the ropes."

The two women lead Emma upstairs to their bathroom. Ruby got out her tampons while Snow grabbed her pads. They explained how they worked to Emma and in the end, she chose pads and headed into her own bathroom to get ready. Ruby wrapped an arm around Snow and lead her downstairs to where David was. Regina, Marian and Robin had already arrived, but went into the living room when Ruby explained what was going on.

"You do realize what this means," Ruby said.

Snow sighed. "Our baby's growing up."

"Not just that. It's time to give her the talk."

David paused. His wives had told him what was going on, but he wasn't expecting that. "Is this really necessary?"

"She's gotten her period, David."

"Yes, but she's only 12. She's not ready to have sex, hell she better not be until I die."

Ruby rolled her eyes. "Okay, hon. That's not going to help us not become grandparents before she finishes high school."

"I have to agree with Ruby," Snow said with a nod. "The question is…which one of us?"

A silence fell over the kitchen. David was staring at his two wives and they were looking right back at him.

"I think I heard that it's best to come from the father," Ruby fibbed.

David rolled his eyes. "Where'd you read that? Ruby Is A Chicken Monthly?"

"Well, why won't you do it?"

"It's awkward! I don't want to have to give that talk to my baby. Why won't you do it?"

Ruby's mouth dropped open then closed, she looked over at Snow. "Snow, you should do it."

"If one of you do it, I'll tell Charlie or Neal. That's why we had three of these kids, so we could each take turns doing this."

"Technically none of them were planned…"

"Shush with your logic."

"This shouldn't be that hard," David interrupted his wives bickering. "I mean, it's just a talk of logistics. Safe sex is important. As much as I don't want her doing it period, she does need to know."

"So, then you do it," Snow suggested.

"Maybe it'd be better suited coming from a woman."

"I have an idea," Ruby went over to the cabinet and pulled out a package of straws. She cut the end off of one of them and put them in a cup so they'd look to be the same height. "We'll draw straws."

David and Snow nodded in agreement, stepping forward and reaching into the cup. Snow ended up pulling the short one. She let out a deep breath and ran her fingers through her hair. It seemed like just yesterday she was holding Emma in her arms for the first time, she couldn't believe it was time for this.

She headed up the stairs to Emma's room, but paused when he heard muffled talking on the other side. She figured maybe her daughter was talking to Henry or something. A few momentts, the door opened and Regina strode out of the room. Emma was sitting on her bed, in complete shock. Snow tilted her head, looking over at Regina.

"What were you two talking about?"

Regina shrugged and it was then that Snow saw the wine glass in her hand. "I heard you three idiots arguing over who would give her the talk, so I bit the bullet and did it. I'm the one that told you. I don't know what lessons David picked up on the farm."

Regina headed down the stairs and Snow poked her head further into Emma's room. Her daughter looked up at her with big eyes.

"I ain't ever having sex."

Snow laughed and walked in, sitting beside her. She wrapped an arm around her and kissed her temple. "It's really not that bad. Just make sure that when you do, it's not until you're much, much older and ready. Also, make sure it's safe. Preferably, when me and your other parents are dead."

"Did Dad tell you to say that?"

"I agreed."

* * *

As always, I do accept prompts! Whether it be on here, my Tumblrs: just-an-outlaw & justanoutlawfanfiction or my Twitter: justanoutlawfic.


	11. Lost In Translation

JustMeAndMyKeboard submitted this prompt: _How about a teen Emma trying to do some kind of cosmetic-y/ plastic surgery like spell on herself that goes hilariously wrong. Charming is chucked out of the room for laughing while Snow and Red are left to try and fix it, or at least cover it up until it can be fixed, whilst trying not to laugh themselves?_

* * *

It was supposed to be a simple spell. She was sick of outsiders' comments that her hair was the lightest of the family's. David was blonde, but it was darker and as he aged it became moreso. Both her mothers had dark hair and as a result, so did Neal and Charlie. Sure, she could've just dyed it but the teen figured why waste money when she had magic?

Finding a cosmetic spell in one of the books Regina gave her, she set out to change her blonde curls to raven black. However, the spell was in Elvish and she was still learning the language. Therefore, her intent of "hair like my mothers'" came out as "hair like my dog's". Her hair flowed and changed alright, but became a mixture of their Dalmatian's color, a puppy from Pongo and Perdita's litter.

David, Snow and Ruby were getting ready to pick up Neal and Charlie from various play dates when they heard sudden screaming coming from Emma's room. Grabbing their various weapons, they raced up the stairs and burst open her door. They dropped the weapons when instead of finding their oldest in danger, she was stood in front of her mirror, her hair now straight and pure white with black polka dots throughout.

Snow and Ruby managed to contain their laughter, but David couldn't. Emma turned to him and glared.

"Dad!"

Snow walked over and put a hand on her daughter's back. "David, Neal is at Gideon's and Charlie is at Lilo's. Go pick them up, please."

David was still snickering as he kissed Emma's head and said he was sorry before leaving the room. Emma hugged and threw herself back on the bed.

"Care to explain, pup?" Ruby asked, using the term of endearment without thinking. "Um, I mean, Em."

A small pout fell on her lips. "I just wanted to dye my hair. I found a spell, but I must've mixed up the words."

"Why would you want to dye your hair?" Snow asked, each mother sitting on either side of her.

Emma chewed on her lip. "Someone made a comment the other day. They said I had to be adopted, that my hair is too light to be a Charming."

Ruby and Snow felt their muscles tighten. Adoption wasn't something to be made fun of, period. It especially wasn't okay to tease about, when the person knew it wasn't true.

"You know that's not true," Snow said, softly. "You have your daddy's hair and smile."

"Plus your mommy's eyes and chin," Ruby added, stroking the prominent feature.

"You even have bits of Mama in you," you both have that birthmark." It was an act biology couldn't explain. Regina once said it was probably an act of true love, it was the most powerful magic of all.

Emma sighed. "I just wanted to look more like you."

"You don't have to change who you are. You're beautiful."

"I was until I got Dalmatian hair."

Ruby laughed. "You're still beautiful."

"Can you fix it?" Emma asked.

"Magic is probably need to fix this and Regina is out of town on her second honeymoon." Snow saw her daughter's face fall again. "But, Mama and I may have some tricks to help."

While Snow fixed Emma's hair up in a bun, Ruby dug through her closet and found a fashionable head scarf she had worn under the curse. It was red and black and would completely cover the up-do. It wasn't as in style as it had been 15 years prior, but it would do until Regina could fix it. The entire time, Ruby and Snow did their best to not laugh at the situation.

When David returned with the younger kids, he found Emma up in her room. Making a face at the scarf, he headed into his room and returned with his favorite Red Socks hat. Carrying it back in, he tossed it her way. Flashing him a grateful smile, she put it on her head.

"Thanks, Dad," she said.

"No problem, kiddo," A smirk fell across his lips. "Charlie's been begging for a second dog., should I tell her we have one."

Emma rolled her eyes and poked out her tongue, though she was smiling a bit. "You should get your own comedy show."

"Move over Jerry Seinfeld," David boasted proudly.

* * *

As always, I do accept prompts! Whether it be on here, my Tumblrs: just-an-outlaw & justanoutlawfanfiction or my Twitter: justanoutlawfic.


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